Losing It All

Monday, November 07, 2005

Same Stuff Different Day

So it has been two weeks. And my weight loss is up too..... drumroll please..... 5 pounds. So I didn't lose anything last week but I also didn't gain anything so I guess that's okay. But it is incredibly frustrating that I watched what I ate all week and worked so hard at the gym three times last week. I didn't even have any candy on Halloween. But I guess you can't have a five pound loss every week. I was thinking about weight and weight gain the other day. And I was wondering why no one ever told me that I was gaining weight. I know it would exactly be politically correct for someone to say wow your ass is getting really big. But seriously why did it take tipping the scales at 300 pounds for me to decide to do something about it? That's really ridiculous. And the only person that I have to blame is myself. I have drastically changed my eating style and my lifestyle for that matter and I seem to be doing rather well. I no longer dread going to the gym... okay that was a blatant lie. Going to the gym is still not my favorite thing to do. But now I am able to make it all the way through a step class. And miraculously I can walk the next day. (That wasn't possible two weeks ago). And my mood has definitely improved... I've heard that has something to do with endorphins. And it definitely helps that I have a group of friends going through this with me. Especially when I think I overworked my coffee drinking muscle last week. Seriously, I had to put a straw in my coffee because it hurt to much to lift my coffee cup all the way to my mouth. Now if that is any indication of how little my muscles get used.... wow. I look at little kids at the store running amok and I have a hard time remembering having that much energy. I'm sure I did.... all kids are like that right? But then again maybe that is part of the problem. Maybe I have just been under active my whole life. But that can't be true either. I played volleyball, basketball and ran track in middle school and I played softball in high school and I was in the marching band (go ahead and laugh I know you want to). So maybe I need to sue Mc Donald's. There food is too easily accessible. It is way too easy to just stop and grab something that is not good for you at all. But it is too easy to blame someone else. I am the only one to blame. It is completely my fault that I am the way that I am. Wow. I think that is the first time that I have ever said that. Hmmm. It is my lack of will power and lack of self control that has molded me into what I am. I guess I will just have to continue with my mantra... nothing tastes as good as thin feels... nothing tastes as good as thin feels.....

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